How to Melt Your Private Parts With Wi-Fi

There has been a lot of press lately about the perceived dangers of Wi-Fi. For example, Forbes ran this one earlier in the year. There have been lawsuits about Wi-Fi endangering health. Then you have major vendors like Cisco publishing safety briefings, and online forums where IT professionals debate topics like safe distances from WLAN access points.

And if you need a laugh, give these nutjobs a few minutes of your time.

The truth is, you don’t have to wonder what safe “is” when it comes to transmitters. You can invest some time and learn what existing FCC regulations are on RF safety and how to computationally prove whether a given scenario is safe or not.  Go the lazy route, and with just a bit of information, you can figure it out using online calculators like this one.

But back to Wi-Fi fears in particular. If you’re worried about those wireless access points on the ceiling at work, you might want to forgo considering the use of a new automotive hotspot, lest you tempt the fates to wreak RF-induced havoc on your naughty parts from the Wi-Fi just a few inches away. I’m just sayin’…


7 thoughts on “How to Melt Your Private Parts With Wi-Fi

  1. KC0KEK

    If anyone would have cancer from prolonged RF exposure, it’s ham radio operators. But I’ve never heard of a study exploring whether we have significantly higher rates than the general population.

    1. wirednot Post author

      Agreed there. I do remember getting cooked one night in my Air Force years when a junior tech didn’t properly shield the antennas of an electronic warfare system we were working on. I felt my kidneys and other parts heating up before realizing it. Since then, I have three kids that are geniuses, so maybe a little RF is actually good thing.

  2. John

    So not in the ceiling above the giant bags of water….but right down low and in perfect position to be destroyed by one or both of my legs/knees every time I get in and out of the vehicle. Awesome! I’m sure Charlie Miller will have fun with this….if Uber allows.

  3. Nop

    If you’re worried about your nuts shutting down, tight underwear is a much bigger danger than a few milliwatts of RF from a WiFi access point.


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