Thank Goodness 5 GHz Is Done For American Wi-Fi

When you think about it, the whole 5 GHz thing has been a complete pain in the backside since it came to the Wi-Fi world. Sure, the 802.11a technology worked in cleaner spectrum than 11b and g back in the day- but it was so complicated. We all had to learn some new numbers and acronyms, and that in itself really sucked.  Sometimes 5 GHz rubber ducky antennas were flat or squarish instead of round. It was pretty over-the-top. But looking back, it got worse… MUCH worse.

With 802.11n and 11ac, utter craziness set in. They were doing this “wide channel” thing, and the 2.4 GHz band started losing users. Clients were getting faster speeds and better overall Wi-Fi experience in that ridiculous 5 GHz band. What is THAT? Like seriously- common clients had the gall to adapt to 5 GHz… And the WLAN vendors! Holy crow, those idiots out in the Silicon Valley actually made dual-band access points! What in the name of all things decent and technically prudent were they thinking?

And then there’s Apple. Just shut up about Apple and all of the kick-ass 5 GHz radio hardware they like to use. You can see where all of this is going… some pencil-necks at the IEEE got a wild hair, this 5 GHz debacle gained traction, and a bunch of users and industry muckety-mucks thought life was better with 5 GHz and dense deployments than when range-oriented 2.4 GHz was king.  Idiots…

Just in time, Globalstar has come along to save us from ourselves and our 5 GHz delusions. With keen analysis and the assistance of hyper-astute experts backing the company up, Globalstar has rightly put the ignorant masses in their place when it comes to the silly notion that 5 GHz has any relevance on the American Wi-Fi landscape. Thankfully, the satellite company has prevailed, and is convincing an equally astute media that their seemingly wankerish channel 14 TLPS juju truly is the Holy Grail of Wi-Fi Goodness for data starved Americans. Forget about all of those confusing channels in 5 GHz- THEY DON’T EXIST. Those channels and all of that speed and spectral cleanliness are dead to us. Which makes the TLPS thing that much more sexy.

Back to where we started- between what’s there now and what’s coming, there are freakin’ dozens of channels and a couple hundred confusing MHz in that pesky 5 GHz spectrum. We just don’t need the complexity, and Globalstar is smart to bring us back to like 1993, when things were so much simpler. By spinning it right, we simply disregard 5 GHz! That leads us to the payoff of TLPS:

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Forget for a moment that IF 5 GHz was still relevant, Globalstar’s single-channel 14 TLPS play would add some spit in the bucket to TRUE “US Wi-Fi Capacity”.  Those days are evidently behind us, because I read it on the Internet and in Globalstar’s pitch for TLPS approval. The simple elegance of this mindset is easy to appreciate.

I had three channels. Now I got another. Boom! I just added 33%. High fives!

You just have to discipline yourself to forget that 5 GHz exists. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go figure out how to tell 65% or better of my thousands of  users (those misguided souls on 5 GHz) that they aren’t using “US Wi-Fi”.

And that’s just un-American.

2 thoughts on “Thank Goodness 5 GHz Is Done For American Wi-Fi

  1. Pingback: 3/18/2015: What’s Happening On the Periphery? | W to the 4th

  2. Pingback: Could Missing Filters and a Potential Conflict of Interest at the FCC Mean A Bad Deal for Wi-Fi? Another TLPS Blog | wirednot

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